Long live internet shopping!

I have nearly recovered.
From Oxford Street and its environs on a Saturday in late November.
I managed not to kill anyone although the urge was strong.
Too many people in not enough space equals me wanting to batter said people.
And I had to deal with beads. About which I knew virtually nothing. I now know they're expensive. And that the shop I went to advertises things at different prices for different quantities on their website than they sell in store. I also couldn't find half of what I saw on their website. ::loathing::
Necessitating a further foray through the crowds to John Lewis, who also didn't have everything I wanted but did have preposterous queues which I stood in and debated whether I was going to faint and what I'd end up saying to nice ambulance personnel if I did so. Fainting was avoided. I was very hot. I get hotter when I get stressed and I Was Stressed. I was consequently distinctly soggy.
John Lewis also helpfully has those wheely baskets - I am in favour of. Sadly they don't have aisles large enough to accommodate the baskets and other people. ::groan::

This expedition meant I was not in favour of going to Sainsburys for something for dinner so we went to the Cambodian place round the corner. I had too much salt (I think) and having fallen asleep for 2 hours at 9.30pm woke up and then couldn't get back to sleep until gone 2am; because I was Hot and also felt like I'd had all the liquid sucked out of me and my tongue was sticking to the inside of my mouth. I did keep drinking water - but I think I was just sweating it off again.....
::blech::

Tongue has mostly unstuck itself now.

::snooze::

I'm really tired this evening.
I was late to bed last night and getting up for work this morning was hard. I really didn't want to go. It was OK once I was there and I seem to be getting back into the swing of the work fairly easily. I took my headphones in so I could listen to the radio whilst working which helped to stop be feeling a bit bored.
Guides were giddy and unwilling to listen this evening. ::sigh:: I am too tired to do a good job and keep feeling like I'm just not achieving enough for them. I feel like there are so many things we have to get done that they're not getting to do what they want to do. And I am doing precisely 0 delegating - I really bad at that. ::sigh::
I think I should go to bed.
I'm probably too tired to be even thinking about it all.
Night night.

I'm too hot and I'm too weighed down to say anything today.
Blah and other assorted words.
A head full of shoulds and oughts.
Going nowhere.
Weight.
Weighing.
Weighted.

The future.......

My brain just exploded. I just read the date 2016. The year, the date, 2016. Is it just me or does this look like a totally made up date? My brain can cope with 2012 - 2013 and beyond? Nope, doesn't exist.

I try, I really do!

Dumbo here went and bought a bunch of yarn for Christmas knitting yesterday and misremembered the U.K. equivalent of worsted yarn. I know have an excess of DK rather than Aran.
Moral of the story?
Don't yarn shop on impulse when you accidentally pass a yarn selling shop. When will I learn to bloody well write down things and not rely on memory - which I know to be rubbish. I should have restricted myself to the bamboo dpns which I knew I needed in 3mm for plane knitting and left it at that.....
::sigh::
I guess I'll be ransacking Ravelry for DK neck warmer patterns now.....if you've any ideas then flag 'em up for me please!

Moving on.
I am not one of Pavlov's dogs. (obviously)
Arimidex=worsening hot flushes - especially *sugar* connected ones.
But, I don't learn. You'd think that if you ate something with sugar in and then had an evil hot flush a few minutes later you'd start to associate them with the sugary things and not want to eat them any more. Nope, not here, doesn't work. I crave sugar, eventually cave and eat something sweet, have hot flush, throw open windows or pull off jumpers or remove socks or all of the aforementioned, curse myself for eating sugar. Rinse and repeat.
Utterly dumb.
Of course, it's pretty hard not to have any sugar but I hardly eat fruit; *definitely* no fruit juices - they're pure sugar; I fall down over cake/biscuits and I go through phases of craving coke (during which I loathe myself). But most of the time - water only. Really. Just water. By the pint.
If I'm on my own I probably won't eat hot food either. Eating anything will bring on hot flushes - so I put off eating until I'm really hungry, at which point I'm really hungry so I eat anything quick and easy. Hello biscuits. ::sigh::
I'm guessing the homoeopath may increase my Belladonna dosage in a couple of weeks time. Which helps. But it doesn't cure it all. Which is what I want. I'd like to sleep on my nice 100% cotton sheets as opposed to the poly-cotton mix ones which dry out more quickly when you're sweaty at night. I'd quite like not to be the person in my office still sitting there in t-shirts whilst everyone else is in sweaters.
::sigh::
End of whine.
Drip.

Cooking dangerously

Red Velvet cake is *very* red......making it turned my fingers red.
Plus it had the oddest icing I've ever had - which was a butter cream icing with the addition of some flour cooked in milk and then left to cool before being stirred into the butter cream. Tasted fine but had a slightly gelatinous texture and was shiny and not entirely smooth. Odd, not unpleasant, just odd.
I do like to live dangerously when having people round for dinner - I'm not one for cooking old favourites - it's new recipes down the line. Hence the Red Velvet plus improvised duck. Which fortunately turned out well.....I think I like to stress myself out!! ;)
Still, now we head into the season of Christmas food - not so much trial and error there. (Although I am contemplating whether I can make some version of mincemeat with dried blueberries and cranberries - my dad can't have raisins/currants/sultanas because of his kidneys. Technically he probably shouldn't have any dried fruit at all - high potassium levels - but I was hoping that since fresh blueberries and cranberries are ok we might get away with it......shall continue to ponder.)

Think warm thoughts

Because it's now wintery and dark at early o'clock in the evening I'm starting to feel all gloomy. So a quick sally into the summers' photo collection is in order. Join me!









A hot afternoon in York












Dressed up in my finery for a wedding








A sunny evening by Campbeltown Loch












An attack of the owls








This is what happens when I get hold of the camera - we get artsy photographs looking at perspective and focus....

Over my shoulder

I have six pairs of waterproof trousers hanging up in my bathroom - still covered in mud. I cunningly attempted to have a bath this morning whilst still leaving them hanging up. It wasn't entirely a success since I ended up with several leaves in the bath with me...... Tomorrow I will tackle them with a scrubbing brush and the shower attachment.
Of course, from my vantage point in the bath this morning I observed that one pair actually has a torn leg; given that most of them hadn't even been worn before last Saturday means I am not pleased. So, I shall have to trawl ebay for another pair to replace them.
On the up side - at least I shan't have to clean that pair!

I was trying to explain to someone the other day that I cannot plan anymore. 2010 is the centenary of U.K. Guiding and there will be grand events afoot - and I dearly hope to see it and take part but I just find it very difficult to engage in planning for that far ahead. Actually, I find it very difficult to make plans for next week never mind next year. And it's not that I'm consciously thinking that I'm afraid to make plans or somesuch - my brain literally melts at the thought of planning things. I have no concept any longer - the future is just white mush in my mind.......
And perhaps I being just a little pissy with it - maybe something along the lines of "if you're not going to give me certainty in my life then I'm not making plans and being let down". It's kind of a feeling of avoiding being tricked or caught out. All cancer seems to achieve is making me even more obstinate.....

That whole work thing

I survived.
The first day. Over. Done.
Wasn't as bad as it could have been.
And I got my desk back too - without having to ask. All that trauma for no reason! ::sigh:: Typical!
I skulked in at 10am without being spotted and quite shamefully lurked in the journal stacks until I could get to the stairs without being spotted. As I stood there peering through the journals I thought how much more embarrassing being caught lurking in the stacks would be compared to just having walked in and said 'hello' to people......but I got away with it anyway.
I stood outside the office door for a few minutes and it took a couple of goes before I could bring myself to actually go in. Once there it was bearable - I saw straight away that my desk was clear which took me out of my defensive mode a bit. My two immediate colleagues were pleased to see me and were welcoming without being too fussy or prying or "how are you?".
I spent the day in pottering - unpacking my stuff, trying to sort out my computer which in my absence has gone a bit potty. Initially it was having fits and telling my profile was too large - which turned out to be because it was saving multiple copies of my Outlook archives - who knows why! But the remote IT helpline people fixed that. However they couldn't work out why Workflows - the cataloguing program we use - was refusing to open. So they'll come and look at it in person tomorrow.....
Other than a little chat with my line manager about who the new folk in the office were it really wasn't much of a day. I was on the tired side by the time I went home at 3pm but wasn't completely exhausted - which was good. The real question remains of exactly how much cataloguing I actually remember; plus having to learn the new procedures and MARC 21 rules.....
And tomorrow I imagine I'll get to start investigating all this!
I had today off and I'll have Friday off too - a very gentle start with 2 days this week and probably 3 next week, plus I'm sticking at 10am-3pm for as long as I can wangle it!! :)
The only iffy bit of the day was the giant 'diss' from the girl who had been in my desk and had been moved. We did the whole nod and 'hi' thing and I said something like "[are] you alright?" and she responded with "not really" and I went all "oh, mumble" and then she proceeded to say to me "How are you? You're looking...." [pause, she looks me up and down] and I can't remember her exact word but basically something along the lines of 'not too bad'. At which I imensely insulted - plus quite amused. Mostly because I hate it when people tell me how well I'm looking - and here I was being insulted at being told I wasn't looking well!! Actually, I think most of the insult was from the fact that I'd dressed smartly for work and was actually wearing make-up for the first time in an eon. So - there we are.
Let's hope tomorrow is as mostly pain-free.

Peace

When I was around 16 or 17 I read Remarque's "All Quiet on the Western Front" and I think I can quite definitively say that that book shaped my feelings and opinions on war. I could say it moved me; I could say it horrified me but actually what it did was leave me huddled on the floor, crying and rocking saying "I didn't know; I didn't understand" - for several hours. I don't think I've ever felt so guilty; so sick; so disgusted to be part of the human race - that we could kill each other; that we could kill our young. That we could have so little regard for each other that we would give in to such primitive emotions.
For many years after that I always wore a white poppy for Remembrance Day. And I can say that doing so brought me some unwelcome attention that you perhaps wouldn't expect. I wore that white poppy because I never wanted another young man or woman to die at the hands or intentions of another engaged in war. I did so because I felt so strongly that the loss of all those lives as the result of war was devastating; because I felt so distressed by the thought of all those children and wives and parents who lost sons in distant wars; because I felt so angry that these men had sacrificed themselves for those loved ones. Because in my mind they should have lived. I never wore it because I wanted to show disrespect for those who had died; or because I didn't value their sacrifice. I wore it because I wanted a better, a peaceful future - because I didn't want their sacrifice to be in vain.
But that disrespect; that lack of compassion; that was what other people seemed to see in my white poppy. In actual fact - even when I wore my white poppy I would still give money to the British Legion; and go to Remembrance Day parade services.
I haven't worn a white poppy for quite a few years now. And I've felt guilty every year that I haven't. Today I felt that wearing that red poppy had made me an accomplice to the deaths of all those Servicemen and Servicewomen in Afghanistan and Iraq in recent years. I haven't been setting the right example; I actually haven't been honouring those who have lost their lives for a better future, I've been letting their deaths become the status quo. I don't want men and women to go to war - I want us, the human race, to start learning and communicating and to start being one human race with regard and respect for life not just for lives lost.
And yes, that's a high ideal. But I think that I would rather we strove for high ideals than fulfilled lesser expectations. And whilst we don't strive for peace - we are resigning ourselves to wars.
If you have sons and daughters, wives and husbands, mothers and fathers involved in armed conflict - understand this: I want them to come home to you. I want them to live in a world where they are not asked to sacrifice themselves. I do not lack respect for what they do; I do not lack appreciation for what they do and have done and I certainly do think that we should remember all those who have died in past wars and current wars. And I have done so. But I want a different world for them, for you, for us, for me. One where we are all safe. One where it *is* quiet along the front; because there is no front. And certainly not a world where a young man sees his friends shot and blown up and hit by shrapnel and losing limbs and life.
Peace be with you, wherever you are.
So, today this blog wears what I did not today - the white poppy:

Hi ho, hi ho....

It rained and rained and rained and rained today.
So I didn't go out and celebrated my last day before going back to work by staying in my dressing gown until 2pm.
And finished knitting a sock. Which fits perfectly. Excellent. Very pleasing to have got all the measurements correct. Plus my cast off cuff is an excellent tension and goes over the heel very easily but still stays up around the ankle.
I'm still deciding exactly how I'm going to react to the fact my desk in inhabited by someone else. And what the hell I'm going to say to people. I think "Hello, please don't talk to me" probably isn't really going to set the right tone. But I do mostly want to not talk to people.
::sigh::
The problem of having turned a bit reclusive.
It's the fake jollity I can't stand the thought of. And I know I'll end up doing the "I'm fine!" Lalalala.
I've been trying to train myself to say "Oh just trying to catch up with all the gossip round here!" and if pressed about how I am "Oh, it's all very dull; let's not talk about it - I hear there are changes afoot with the the ED and TLs"
But that still feels very fake jollity.
And I must not say "Back off bitch!"
You know when you see in films and Sci-fi things when someone's been taken over by some Alien consciousness and they're struggling to remain themselves but the Alien keeps cutting in and making them say inappropriate things - I feel a bit like that sometimes. Like there's some really pissed off alien in me that sometimes just wants to cut in with things like "Oh just fuck off!" and "Screw you!". Obviously so far I have kept the alien under control but I worry that one day I won't.
I also know I'm going to feel horribly guilty about not having responded to the emails and calls from a couple of members of staff whom I was friendly with. I have emailed and said I'm coming back and apologised for that and explained that I wasn't really talking with anyone but I'm not sure that it's really mended fences.
::sigh::
I guess I'm really not looking forward to going back. I didn't really think I was. And I knew that I wouldn't really know for certain until I got to crunch time. Well, crunch. Here we are.

Clonk! My head hitting the floor.

Posts for the last 2 days read something like the following:
7/11/08
Argh! Hit Morrisons 15 minutes before they close for ingredients for my guides cooking competition entry. It's midnight! I'm still printing out cooking competition judging forms. I still haven't decanted 2 litres of meths into smaller bottles for use tomorrow. Personal kit? What personal kit? What? *I* need wellies too?! Some more argh!
8/11/08
Plan says leave house at 8.30am - actually leave house at 9.10am - can I hear an 'argh!'?
Rain! Nonono, rain go away! Rain goes away mostly.
Campsite is absolute sea of mud.
Cooking is largely a success.
I eat lots of strange food in the pursuit of the best meal. Including chocolate porridge with marshmallows.....strangely good, strangely sick-inducing.
Noone burns themselves/otherwise sets fire to themselves or things; noone chops their fingers off; noone drinks meths and blinds themselves. I call this a major achievement.
Run out of time for proper pioneering - I throw together a few a-frames for guides and brownies to play with. Fairly successful.
Trees are planted; but not by me. I spent the remaining time trying to match up pieces of trangia and re-pack the 4 crates it took me 3 days to pack in the first place.
Attend official tree-planting ceremony. Admire virulent green cakes.
Pack up more stuff. Return stuff borrowed. Undo knots and lashings on a-frames. It's dusk by this point so I'm untying by touch rather than sight. Good job I know my lashings and knots and haven't tied any grannys by mistake.
Make Dear Other load the car. Incidently The Dear Other was also 'made' to be one of the judges for the cooking competition. He handled it admirably - even the threats made by one guide of holding a grudge forever if her team didn't win. Apparently she was joking.....
Eat virulent green cake in hopes that the pure (green) sugar would keep me going til we got home. It was exceedingly sweet, and did I mention the green?
Get in car through tricky procedure of removing waterproof coat, pulling down waterproof trousers so I could sit in car, remove wellies so I can pull waterproofs off the rest of the way, put on trainers, sit in car, groan, take pill I should have taken mid-afternoon, groan.
By the time we got home I had stiffened up so much I could barely unfold myself out of the car.
Asleep in bed by 8.30pm. Deeply sad.

Today?
Today was Remembrance Sunday, so church parade with guides. Nearly disgraced myself by giggling at the Sweet Camden Lass' enthusiastic reading. It was the intonation on "Adulterers!" that did me in. Aparently it had a lot of exclamation marks. Was excused chaperoning the trip to High School Musical 3 in favour of going home and rewashing the 6 trangias, unpacking my crates, washing blahs and blahs and blahs. Blah blah - it was dull, I cannot face thinking about it again - yawn. I have *not* attacked the 6 pairs of waterproof trousers that need seriously demudifying: treat for tomorrow. Then in a relaxing, total change of pace I get to go back to work on Tuesday. Which is seriously going to eat into my knitting time. Shame.

Brain overload

It's raining again and I'm all of a confuddle as I try to count trangias and knives and wooden spoons and teatowels and a multitude of other things
And write last minute letters to parents saying "wellies! Dear God, send your daughter in wellies!"
I brought home 2 litres of meths today - it's amazing how noone bats an eye as you buy two litres of flammable liquid.....
The Dear Other is coming to this event and one of the organisers asked if he'd be able to help with the digging......I didn't laugh. He's perfectly capable of doing lots of digging; but it's the sort of thing that he'll get bored and frustrated with very quickly.....probably in a manner similar to a brownie. Hee. That'll be fun!
In the meantime, I still need to test 4 trangia burners - I don't want to be caught out. Plus, work out what to do with the group of Guides coming who have only told me this week that they're coming but have decided not to take part in the cooking competition.....erm - here's a field. Sit in it. I think they've defaulted themselves into helping brownies plant trees.....
Plus printing. I have to print and photocopy things and remember things and make sure my second group of Guides know what to cook.....eek.
Argh.
Urgle.
Then I'm watching High School Musical 3 on Sunday. It's called "how to bribe brownies and guides to come to church parade". And I don't feel good about it. (that may be the "start of something new" - ack!)

Brand new day

On waking up and checking the good ol' internets I have actually cried.
With relief.
I may have been born in the U.K., I may never have lived in the U.S.A. for any great length of time but I am American (and I'm British - I'm both). My mum worked hard as my brother and I were growing up to instil in us a sense of identity as Americans. And having that identity has not always been easy. I encountered a lot of scorn growing up; I don't sound American and I don't go around with "I'm a U.S. citizen" tattooed on my forehead so I could not tell you the number of times I've been present when someone has been making generalised slurs about American people. Now, I know there are some pretty odious American people out there in the world - but there are equally some pretty odious British people out there in the world too; because people's actions and attitudes are defined and moulded by more than their nationality. Then, I'm afraid, the whole Afghanistan/Iraq-thing brought more anti-U.S. (or anti-George Bush) feelings to elements of the general British public.
I would like a United States that I does not require me to go around defending part of my nationality. And I hope Barack Obama and the increased Democratic representation in both the House and the Senate will put the U.S. in more of a position that Europeans can understand and will feel they have something in common with.
I know it's pretty unusual for me to get political on this site - and I hope that doesn't send any of you up there in arms (which I defend your right to bear - I wouldn't myself and quite frankly I'm alarmed by the number of children and young people that get hurt or killed by firearms. If you have 'em - *please*, *please* don't give them to your eight year old to play with or leave them where your teenager can get at them if they decide they're having a bad year at school.....but, the Constitution says you can - and I respect that.) I voted this year (and I have voted in every election since I was old enough to vote in 1996 - even from overseas) If you're disappointed that your candidate didn't win - I'm sorry; I can relate - I've felt like that the last two times. It's wretched - and we feel wretched because we care about our country. We think that care should come in different ways - but remember, I have a British ethos at the base of my beliefs. I *really* believe in healthcare that's free at point of use (it's not free, the money for it doesn't come out of thin air) - I've paid for my health care; I've just paid for it a little bit at a time in every paycheque - in my taxes. And yes, "Who's this FICA guy and why's he getting all my money?" (Except we don't have FICA here, obviously) But over the last four years I'm really grateful that I paid my money that little bit at a time and wasn't forking over handfuls of cash at every chemotherapy appointment.

End ramble.
Hey, the guy I voted for won. And, yes, I'm from Massachusetts - so it's not like my vote upset the applecart and turned that whole election around. So I'm happy. But I'm sorry if you're not.

Too late

Ah crap.

Crap crap crap.

How did I miss this?

Well, I know how I did - I'm just really angry that I had left such a big space since I last emailed her. Too slow. Too sporadic. I hate that I'm like that. I wish I'd leapt up and visited her as soon as we'd emailed. In my head I always hoped we'd meet in real life. I think I would have liked Dee a great deal in person; I liked her a great deal in the written word.

I'm sorry Dee; and I'm so sorry for your family and friends. I hope it all played out like you'd planned.

Beastly, beastly disease....

If you can't turn it into literature then there's no point

Ow.
Back.
Hurts.
I'd blame the hopeless chairs I had to sit on for 2 hours except it had started to ache a bit before then.....
::sigh::

Here we have my evening in poetic form:

Creak, creak go the chairs
They are too small anyway
Ridiculous seats.

Some meetings are dull
Plus some people shouldn't speak
Yawning not allowed

The Body Haiku:
I am sick of aches
One part after another
Please just go away

Alternatively:
Ibuprofen, yay!
Plus a hot water bottle
Improves things slightly

My day tomorrow:
Tidy up again
Ring about insurance quote
Finish weekend plan

In which we upload a lot of photos......

Hello! And welcome to today's report on: Do I still have any eyebrows (or a place to live)?

The good news is, yes! To both questions! I have cooked a meal, I have not blown up my house trying to light methylated spirits, I have not burnt myself or anything and I have neither poisoned myself with meths or in general (well, insofar as I can tell so far.)

Here we have the story in full:
Here is my trangia set up - and because I'm a cheatery-mccheater-pants it's set up on my kitchen counter. Well, it's cold and dark outside.....and I didn't want my neighbours to call the police and report some strange figure setting fire to things at the back of my flats. Being arrested by the police wasn't high on my list of aims for the evening. In this picture you have the bonus views of my toaster and the pan I used for porridge this morning, in the sink, You're welcome!


Oooh looky! Here I have filled my fuel vessel with my meths and water mixture and lit it - with a looong match coz I'm a wuss. This vessel took nearly 100ml of meths plus 20ml of water. Diluting your meths at a ratio of 15-20% water to meths will prevent your pans and the burner holes on your fuel vessel getting all sooty. A saving on washing up and non-sooty fuel vessel holes makes for a more efficient burn - yay!
I opened my kitchen window once I had lit my trangia - it smelt a bit funny.
Oh look, here I forgot to take a picture of my water in the pan beneath these onions - well, that would be a dull picture; so, probably just as well.
Here are very finely chopped onions in some olive oil - coz I'm posh like that. I'm also a mean chopper, so I can chop my onions this small.....go me! My onions sat on top of my water the entire time I was waiting for my water to boil.....35 minutes!!!! Which is extreme - especially as the water never actually came to a rolling boil......tsk. After 35 minutes my onions were faintly warm and the oil was *just* beginning to sizzle a tiny bit.
Now, my water has finally come damn-near close to boiling so I got bored and put my pasta (fresh spinach pasta - did I mention the posh?) in and took it off the heat, and put it to one side with a lid on it. I figured that the heat in the water would be enough to soften and heat the pasta through and I was worried that if I didn't do something I'd be having pasta with raw onion for dinner. As soon as I removed the water pot and put the frying pan directly over the heat my onions started sizzling - see them sizzle? They're all in the middle because that's where the hot bit is.....
Well now, my onions are cooking so well that I've added the (fairly finely) chopped mushrooms and they're well on their way to getting nice and soft. In fact, any minute now I'm going to get carried away and add my salt and pepper and oregano. Always add your herbs before your liquids - then you get the nice smell of the herbs in your kitchen. Couldn't tell you if it makes it *taste* any better, but it doesn't make it taste any worse.......


Here we have further evidence of my mccheatery posh ways - instead of bog standard chopped tomatoes (which I do use frequently!) I've added some fancy Bertolli Pecorino cheese and garlic sauce - verrry fancy dinners here folks! It's bubbling away quite quickly now, so once it's heated through I'll put the pot of water and pasta back on the burner and put the frying pan back on top of that to keep it warm....you don't need a picture of that, do you?

This here, this is what you do while you wait for 35 minutes for your water to boil......you drink diet coke with lime (never buying *that* again - ick.) Sit next to an open box of chocolate chip cookies (huh, how did that come to be open.....?) And read your book - Elizabeth Moon in my case. And keep peeking to see if it's boiling yet. Which of course slows down the process because you've let the heat out from under the lid. Damn my impatience!


Gosh, but I'm bored of waiting now.....my pasta is looking pretty wibbly and steamy, even if it isn't boiling. A sample is taken and approved - in fact, it's a little mushy. Tut. So, off the heat it comes and the sauce is whipped back on to make sure it's nice and warm while the pasta is drained. Pasta is manouvered to plate and sauce applied - the end result is as follows:



Ta dah!
The finished product - I still have not died from eating it and it did not taste of meths. It tasted of pecorino cheese and garlic, and spinach pasta.
I cannot currently say I'm as good as a bronze DofE group since I didn't actually cook it outside - but I'm now one step ahead of the girls I'll be supervising at Saturday's cooking competition! Bonus!
And, no, noone ever called me a tidy cook - hence the stuff all over the counter-top.

The amount of meths lasted for an hour and 10 minutes. This is a *lot* longer than I was anticipating - however I *was* indoors in a fairly warm room. Quite frankly, I *dread* to think how long I would have waited for the water to heat up if I'd been outdoors.....

So, tune in tomorrow to see if I can be bothered to cook something else on the trangia - maybe I'll even take it outside! Maybe my neighbours will have a fit! Maybe I'll have to fight off London drunks desperate for my meths (unlikely) (I hope) You know you can't wait!

Na Blo Po Mo. Again. Again.

It's that NaBloPoMo time of year again - my heart isn't in it this year so don't be surprised if I vanish midway through.....
Eloquence feels like it's ebbing away. Along with my brain.
Apparently I managed to go to Northampton without my Arimidex last weekend - but didn't notice that I hadn't been taking them for three days....in fact, I thought I *had* taken them at least once and then misplaced the pills but when I got back to London they were here; so I obviously hadn't. On the plus side I had a few days of hardly any hot flushes; on the minus side my axilla and shoulder started to ache again which I think is due to some swelling because of a few nodes in there. I'm sure it'll settle down again now I've started taking them again. I just hope the aching back settles down too - it's been nearly two weeks and it's not as bad as it was but it's not 100% either. Gee, I love being a crock! It's such great fun! (NOT)
Tomorrow, tune in to see if I've blown my up with methylated spirits and a trangia.....