Thursday, April 02, 2009

Whilst you're down there....

I'm so upset.
I've had a lovely 10 days with my brother visiting me from the States and we did some fun and important stuff like spending a couple of days on Lindisfarne where we used to go on holidays as children.
He flew home last night and I was so sad to see him go and apparently he got back having flown 7 and a half hours and his girlfriend picked him up at the airport at 9pm, dropped him off at home while she went to check on a house she was 'sitting' and then came back and dumped him at 1am in the morning.
He's had so much crap in his life already that this was the last thing he needed. He's just weaned himself off antidepressants after around 5 years. His job ends in a month when the store he works in is being closed. He never finished college because of the depression and has never been able to bring himself to go back. He's not eligible for COBRA so he'll have no health insurance. Plus all the crap that's happened to me.
This is not fair. I just want my little brother to be happy. To have someone to support him when things get back with me. To have something go right in his life. I swear my family is cursed. I don't know what we ever did wrong. I've always thought we were good people. I'm sick of it. Sick of constantly dealing with hard stuff. I'm so tired of holding it together, of keeping on keeping on. I'm sick of it; I don't want to anymore. I'd like to give up now.

4 comments:

Sweet Camden Lass said...

Oh, that is ridiculously mean. Can I thump her when I next fly out?

Having been dumped at a similarly disgustingly early hour, it really is rotten. There is a limit to whom you can call at that hour...

*hugs*.

Ciorstaidh said...

{{{hugs}}} for you both,that's not on at all. Does your brother have any family in the area he can lean on for a bit?

You are not cursed, "just" unlucky - shall we have a word with the Big Man Upstairs and ask Him what He's playing at?

titan said...

keep your chin up, and tell him to as well. you are both lucky to have caring siblings and the ability to spend time together. the people in life who are the happiest don't have the best of everything; they make the best of everything they have.

Anonymous said...

Know exactly what you mean about being cursed.All I want is my childrem,grandchildren and extended family to be happy.Yet it's just one thing after another.But there's good things,too.So we can't give up....we'll just fight the next battle.....sooner of ;ater we're bound to win!/////Hugs,Karen